On December 13, 2019, my high school hunny got down on one knee on the rain-drenched ground of Central Park, NYC and asked me to spend forever with him. It was a dream come true. I had always envisioned my future self as a happily married woman with a couple of kids and maybe a cute poster-dog.
I immediately began planning my dream wedding to get a jump start on this reality that I wanted to create for myself. Within ten days I had my entire bridal party solidified and within one month I had found and purchased my dream dress. I was on a roll with venue searching, creating a guest list, and printing save-the-dates. Then.... Covid happened. I work in healthcare as an EMT for a nearby city and covid for us healthcare workers has been an actual nightmare. As this virus escalated, and made its way to the United States, I couldn’t help but just watch all of my plans quickly unravel and there was absolutely nothing I could do about it. I felt helpless but motivated to create a covid-compliant “plan B”. I immediately scrapped all of my previous plans and started back at square one. I eliminated guests, chose a back-up venue, and booked backup vendors. Just as I was feeling confident in my “plan B”, the Massachusetts state governor released updated restrictions and limitations on social gatherings and events.... including weddings. My heart sank as I was faced with this news AGAIN. This time, only 4 months from my wedding date. I was dangerously nervous and discouraged, but I somehow hunkered down and pressed on to creating a “Plan C”. This plan was nothing less than chaotic. Nothing was set in stone and there were so many moving parts that just weren’t definite, but I did my best to stay calm and trust the process. At this point in the planning process, my standards had lowered significantly. I would’ve been just about fine getting it over with in a termite ridden tree house. Luckily that wasn’t the case and after reaching out to several venues and explaining my situation, I finally found one that would allow me to have a very simple wedding with minimal guests. I half-heartedly accepted the venue out of desperation and fear that I would not find another that would provide the same accommodations amidst the ever-changing uncertainty that surrounded what was becoming a global pandemic. After paying the deposit and solidifying our date, I felt like I was back on track. I was ready to re-plan and re-create every other aspect of the wedding with my 250 person guest-list that I had to miraculously reduce to 75 people. I remained optimistic and just kept pushing forward, regardless of the world that was crumbling around me. Looking back, I feel like I put side-blinders on to prevent me from getting distracted by the reality of the chaos that covid was stirring. I just kept my eye on the prize. I so-badly wanted to have a wedding amidst a pandemic with a sense of normalcy. I wanted it to feel worry-free and normal; like every other wedding I had ever attended in my life. Fast forward to three weeks before the wedding. Everything was set in stone, ready for the big day and I want to say that I felt calm and at peace with what was “solidified” for the wedding, but I wasn’t. I was on edge, anxious, and ready for the worst to happen again - for everything to fall apart again... like it had three times prior. Hayden and I were sitting in a meeting with our banker, combining our bank accounts and preparing our finances for the future when I received a phone call from an unknown number. Normally I would not answer a phone number I don’t recognize, but throughout the whole wedding planning process I had been answering every single phone call that rang on my phone, prepared to hear bad news. So I excused myself from the meeting and answered, “Hello?” I said, nervous but hopeful of good news.
“Hi, is this Jillian?” said a regretful sounding voice on the other line.
“Yes, may I ask who’s speaking?”
“Hi Jillian, this is Jo - director of private dining from your wedding venue! I’d like to discuss your event as it’s coming up quickly!”
My voice began deteriorating in worry as I replied, “Yes! It’s coming up quickly and we’re excited!”
The regretful voice on the other end replied, “Yea, about your event, there has been a travel ban between the states of Massachusetts and Rhode Island. With that being said, we will only host you and your guests if you require each guest to show proof of identification along with a negative covid test result received within 72 hours of the event. We are also requiring each guest to wear a mask at all times unless eating, and you’ll need to do away with your DJ, all dancing, open bar, and cake-cutting. Oh and I almost forgot. You need to reduce your guest list from 75 down to 50.”
With a shaking, tear filled voice, I replied, “Okay, can please call you back?”
I wiped my tears knowing I needed to regain my composure to re-enter our banking meeting as if I didn’t just get a trash bag full of bricks thrown at my face. I re-entered the meeting, my mind racing with thoughts and emotions, and quickly signed the required paperwork to leave as quickly as possible. I ran to my car with Hayden, called my mom, and just cried. We’re three weeks away from our wedding and disaster strikes again. Thankfully, my mom remained level-headed and instantly began making phone calls and reaching out to friends who own businesses and could potentially be a great help to us. I had honestly given up at this point. My expectations were low and I just wanted to get this done and over with, an attitude no bride should ever go into her wedding day with, but there I was... doubtful and discouraged. I knew I couldn’t ask all of our guests to bring covid test results and proof of identification, that was too tall of an order to fill. The inability to have a first dance, or father/daughter dance, or mother/son dance was too much to give up. I called Jo back and cancelled our reservation. Two and a half weeks until wedding day and we officially have no venue.
The Rhode Island governor released an update shortly after our cancelation stating that ceremonial gatherings of up to one hundred people were permitted outdoors with guests adhering to the social distancing guidelines. This gave us a glimmer of hope. Hayden’s mom, who is a regular at Thrive Coffee House, gave us the idea to host our ceremony and reception right in the backyard of the coffee house. It has a beautiful large yard overlooking the bay, with views of the Mount Hope Bridge and it’s very own dock. I excitedly reached out to the owner and pleaded my case. She agreed without hesitation and was seemingly excited to host us and save our event. We quickly rented chairs and tables for our guests, booked a caterer, and lined up a team of decorators to set the entire venue up for us the morning of the wedding. We had no restaurant or event coordinator to take care of all the details that a venue normally takes care of, so it was all in the hands of our friends and family who offered to help. The next two weeks were jam packed with meetings and finalizing details with all of our friends and family who were taking responsibility for different aspects of the wedding. There were so many details that needed to be taken care of and so little time to organize it all. However, with each passing day, everything seemed to be miraculously falling into place exactly how it needed to be. Days felt like hours and hours felt like minutes throughout the entire week leading up to the big day. The owner of the property we were using advised us to rent a tent in the case of rain, however, a tent neither matched my aesthetic nor fit in the budget, and therefore we decided against it. We had been keeping a close eye on the weather the entire week, as the ceremony and reception were to be held completely outdoors and we were confident that it would not rain. The weather, in fact, looked perfect. It was predicted to be exactly what we were hoping for; low humidity, partly cloudy, and a temperature in the mid-high 70’s. Our design was set in stone and everyone who was helping make the day happen was ready to go with solid plans in place; run-sheets, schedules, and lists- they had it all!
Before we knew it, it was Saturday, August 22nd; the day we had been waiting for that had costed us so many smiles, laughs, and lots of tears. I remember checking the weather religiously as if my life depended on it. As i sat in the “hair chair” getting my hair all pinned up pretty, I checked the weather yet again. The forecast was sunny blue skies for the whole day, except for a window of time between 4 and 5 pm where there was a 30% chance of a thunderstorm. I took a screenshot of the weather screen and jokingly sent it to Hayden, as our ceremony was scheduled to start at 4pm; the exact time the 30% chance of thunderstorm was predicted for. He laughed it off and assured me not to worry, as these predictions are rarely accurate.
I agreed and continued on with the pre-wedding bliss, trying to savor every moment as it was all passing so quickly. Before I knew it, our party bus had arrived to pick us up and bring us to the ceremony (that I was blindly trusting was fully set up according to plan). The twenty-six minute drive felt like five minutes and my nerves were sky high. I was excited, nervous, scared, relieved, and happy all in one moment. 4:05PM- my scheduled time to enter the ceremony with my parents by my side. As soon as I saw Hayden waiting at the altar for me, everything felt real. Everything I had suffered through planning suddenly felt worth it. Each step I took closer to him meant I was one step closer to our forever. It was surreal and a feeling that simply cannot be put into words. Another feeling that couldn’t be put into words were the feelings I felt as I arrived at the altar and noticed a Hercules black storm cloud heading straight for us. As our ceremony continued, the darkness was rolling in with torrential rain, heavy thunder, and lightning. The pure magical wedding bliss began fading as I began thinking of the effects this storm was about to have on my entire wedding. Why was I so stubborn to opt out of the tent?! After all, guests prefer staying dry over aesthetic. What was going to happen to the beautifully decorated tables, lights, music equipment, and more importantly - the guests?! I tried to remain mentally present throughout the ceremony, but every nearing lightning strike just sent my mind racing all over again. Finally, the ceremony came to an end before the storm reached us. The entire wedding party made an exit from the ceremony and went directly into the party bus for pictures. Our picture venue was about a 10 minute drive from the ceremony site. As we were driving there, the skies darkened. My maid of honor kept assuring me that everything was under control at the reception and that I shouldn’t be worried at all. I assumed she wasn’t telling the truth, but there was really nothing that I could’ve done at that point, so I decided to trust her. As soon as we arrived to our photo location, the stormy sky opened up and it began raining harder than it had the entire summer. It was dark and the weather was nothing less than chaotic; loud whistling wind, pouring rain, and crashing thunder. I sat in disbelief as I reflected on the assurance that Hayden had given me earlier in the day not to worry about that 30% chance of rain. Well, there we were sitting in a party bus with 25 people in the pouring rain while our 75 guest wedding was who-knows-where. Did everyone go home? Did the decorations and tables all get broken down before the storm hit? So many questions were racing through my mind as we waited for the storm to pass. Within 30 minutes a rainbow graced the entire sky. The storm had passed. We rushed out of the bus and began taking pictures. We needed to hurry to make up for the 30 minutes of lost time from the storm. After about an hour of shooting, we started back to the venue for the reception. We had no idea what we were returning to. I was expecting to return to the aftermath of a hurricane-type storm; a mess everywhere, overturned tables, fallen trees and branches, and no guests. To my surprise 90% of our guests stayed and everything was beautifully set up - almost as if nothing had happened.
I was amazed, thankful, and felt overwhelmingly blessed because in that moment I realized that my heaven-sent team of helpers broke the entire thing down and re-set the whole thing back up before we arrived to make sure our reception wasn’t a loss. The whole night was a dream come true and went by way too fast. Before we even had time to blink, it was time for our sparkler send off and away we went to our beautiful honeymoon - both glowing in the bliss of newly-wed magic.
Our original plan was to go to the Maldives. We had everything booked and in place for that, but covid said otherwise. We proceeded to book several other honeymoon vacations including Hawaii, St. Thomas, and Aruba- all of which got cancelled due to the friendly coronavirus. Finally, we decided to keep it simple and stay within the continental United States, as everything elsewhere was unpromising. We were set to spend one week in the Florida keys and fly out to Utah for the second week. This definitely was not our original Maldives paradise vacation, but it’d work. It was better than nothing. Upon arrival, we were shaken by the beauty of the keys. There was so much to do and see - we knew we weren’t going to have any regrets from our final honeymoon choice. We ended up cancelling our second week in Utah after finding the most beautiful resort that was about 45 minutes from the one we were staying at. We didn’t want to leave. Everything about it was perfect. And just like every good vacation, it went by way too fast. Before we knew it, we were on a flight back home to the reality and hustle of everyday life.
After we returned home, I finally mustered up the courage to ask my mom what really happened when the storm hit at the reception while we were away taking photos. She silently pulled out her phone and showed me a video filmed by one of the guests who had recorded the mayhem that occurred. It was a nightmare. Every guest was sopping wet, carrying chairs, tables, decorations, and DJ equipment through the rain into the tiny coffee shop to prevent it from getting wet.
Soon after carrying everything to safety, a police officer showed up to ensure covid regulations were being followed. People were forced to spend the entire “cocktail hour” in their vehicles, waiting for the storm to pass and the reception to start. Not only did law enforcement arrive at this moment, but they returned immediately after we had driven away from our sparkler send off, as a passer-by called in on “a large loud gathering that didn’t appear to be covid compliant”. The officer really didn’t do much his second time back. Most guests were adhering to covid guidelines and he had nothing to correct anyone on. In retrospect, covid ruined my wedding ... but everything worked out MIRACULOUSLY and we were so incredibly blessed by our friends and family who literally made this wedding happen.
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